Justice League from back in 2017; the movie was so terrible – I quit writing reviews after seeing it.
I was so distraught with the idea of thinking about it again that I gave up.
It’s been four years. I think my mental blocks had melted. I can talk about it.
I will not watch the 2017 version again, but I can share what I remember. Because, what is a film if it can’t leave a lasting impressing. What you remember was the film.
My dominant memory glares over all the visuals, story, pacing… Batman / Bruce Wayne only used his right arm to do everything. Right arm punches, right arm grappling hook, right arm pick people up, right arm to throw bat-shaped thingies, right arm pours and serves drinks. Why does he even have a left arm?
I wondered why. I thought, perhaps Ben Affleck had a fight with the 2017 director and said, “well… then I’ll only use my right arm. There! How about that?” I waited four years for some answers to bubble up. IMDB trivia remained and remains silent on the subject.
I rate Justice League (2017) a big 1.38 out of 5.
Now here we are in 2021 with the fabled Zach Snyder Cut of Justice League. It’s here. It’s ready. It’s streamable. The trailers were menacing, different, and I was ready to brace myself and watch it again. Even with it being 4 hours long!
This could be torture, I thought. I will lose a major portion of my life to it. Luckily, it is streaming to home viewers. Saving a bit of life. Zero chance I would have paid to see it in theatres, with parking, etc. So, a view over dinner?
Spoilers ahead!!!
Immediately, I was shocked by the 4:3 format of the film. Surprisingly, I didn’t think about what I was missing on the sides. I found it refreshing. It felt like I could see more. I attribute that to the gained vertical space. Clever.
The trailers and posters made me think it would be in black and white with poignant touches of color. Unfortunately, that not the case. It was in color. Though, it was a bit drab throughout the movie—Snyder’s signature style in top gear. But, I found there was no shining moment in the visuals. If you look at 300, for example, there were plenty of times that the visuals really popped and were central to the plot. Not in his Justice League.
The beginning was packed with new scenes, rearranged segments that made the story more engaging. Though familiar, it felt fresh. The main antagonist, Steppenwolf, received a makeover that made him more interesting to look at and follow. I suppose making him the desperate henchman was at least one extra dimension past being just the big-monster guy.
Then, halfway mark, the story starts coming back to me, sadly. Oh yeah, I remembered, this and that happened. It started to drag hard. The acting wasn’t changed much in the second act. Some really out-of-place lines here and there. Much of the interpersonal drama was removed. I found that odd for cutting it out in a four-hour movie. I think Snyder needed more room for a 10,000% increase in slow-motion segments. More likely, those struggles were exclusive to the 2017 version.
I loved the reduction in cringy jokes versus the original. I know punch-up is needed in a script, set eternally by some mathematical equation in the distant cinematic past. But in Snyder’s JL, that’s all thrown out the window. There is some levity, of course, tastefully sprinkled throughout, like the one or two marshmallow rainbows in a whole box of lucky charms. But that rarity might make you crack a little harder of a grin as you’re gritting your teeth to the action.
Costumes are fine. But Batman always slowly waddles out like he’s a daytime talk show host wearing a silly costume for cheap laughs.
The third act is very different from the original. I was dreading going through the original 2017 film’s third act, which I now remember clear as day. It wasn’t there! It was so much better too. The gravitas, plot, was all on our heroes. In fact, a huge section of that focus was placed on The Flash, and it made him more than just a goofy comic relief character.
Speaking of the heroes, Snyder’s JL being 4 hours long gave enough room to spread the character exploration across all the heroes. Specifically, Cyborg and Flash. Their stories were explored so much that they overshadowed all the others. In fact, by the time the third act had started swinging into full gear, I found myself wanting to see more of their personal struggles. But, I had to sit back and let the action wash over that desire.
Overall, it didn’t feel like four hours—three and a half at most. I think dividing the film with chapter cards was a cheap and effective way to achieve a shortening of perceived time.
So, the big question …..
Did Batman dominantly use his right arm in Zach Snyder’s Justice League?
Yes! Yes, he did.
Except for ONE scene. A newly added scene towards the end where Superman lends old bats a hand, a left hand. This exchange of left hands seemed intentionally placed. The focus of the frame draws you into what I assume is Batman’s feeble, unused left arm. Perhaps this was a way to balance out everything without expensive reshoots.
On the plus side, Zach Snyder almost completely removed the Flash running completely ridiculous and laughable like in the 2017 version. That was nice—not to see.
I rate Zach Snyder’s Justice League 3.2872 out of 5. Lower than expected, mainly due to the fact all technology was essentially magic. Nothing in the whole film seemed like a Raspberry Pi or Arduino project waiting to happen.
I suggest spreading it out over 6 lunch/dinner viewings. Ease into it.
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